Your tendencies may be undeniable, yet they do not control your choices.
“I went from enjoying tropical weather in a tank top to getting soaked by heavy hailing and freezing within minutes,” my Sister, who lives in LA, described her version of the increasingly temperamental weather everywhere these days.
Now, as much as it was natural for me to respond, “What a cool moment to witness,” there was more that came with that sentiment. The thrill of being exposed to contrasting experiences such as this is undeniable. Yet, the general accelerated wildness in our surroundings—I include here our crazy wars and political play — is taxing our psyches and bodies.
So, when I catch glimpses of how unpredictable our environment truly is, I use this exposure as a reminder that there is something I can do to lessen the burden. I’m referring to things that help me stay connected to what restores a sense of stability in my life. One such antidote for me is people who, by their presence alone, help me remember my personal power over my choices.
Today, I wish to introduce you to an important character. One whose strength, endurance, and kindness can help you live with greater ease and less dissonance, no matter the environment.
Please get comfy with your favorite warm beverage and let Kapha tell you a little tale about her and her friends. Grounded in reality, her story will guide you on how to center and renew yourself from the unavoidable wear and tear of living in a wild world.
How can you be so patient?
My friends Pitta and Vata shouted as if I was either into punishment or had mastered some lofty virtue.
Giving my time to what’s calling my attention is simply natural.
I respond.
I’m called to bring big visions into manifestation, which includes quickly removing whatever gets in the way of this!
Pitta, in a sharp and irritated tone, justifies his impatience.
I, too, have better things to do with my time!
Vata leaves the impression that her impatience is also granted in a loud and fast, rambling pitch.
In addition to holding highly different perspectives on just about anything, we have made it a point to ensure that you can spot who is who from miles away. For example, while my Pitta friend is muscular, balding, and tends towards skin rashes, my Vata friend is tall and thin, with frizzy hair and dry skin. I, on the other hand, am voluptuous, with thick hair and lustrous skin.
Beyond our physical appearances and psyches, our internal systems have distinct ways of responding to our environments.
To give you a sense of this, I’ll use the example of a “typical” late winter/ early Spring here in the northern hemisphere.
The increased water and weight brought by the melting snow harmonizes with my friends, especially Vata. Light and dry, the heavier and moist environment is grounding to her. Yet, I do better in summer’s warmth or autumn’s gusts. Qualities that are heavy and moist aggravate me. When my tendencies are heightened, I crave lounging around and indulging in creamy foods.
Name one thing that you are avoiding today! Next, address this so you can break free from this lazy and stubborn loop!
My Pitta and Vata friends shout this when my tendencies seem to carry me to the edge of disharmony. To their credit, my energy tank is full. So, I have no reason for being glued to my couch. I am neither weak nor depleted; I lack the motivation.
When in this mode, I indeed get attached to my ways. And no, mental stagnation is not my only challenge when I’m off balance. At these times, I may also experience excess mucus, lung congestion, edema, weight gain, and more.
Fortunately, with help from my friends, I addressed one thing I’m avoiding, which is all it takes to get me out of that stagnating loop.
You not only have a calm disposition capable of helping us rewire our relationship to emotional triggers such as impatience, but you also provide us with a most nourishing sense that all is well. We feel safe and secure around you. Okay, don’t let it get to your head too much, but through you, dear Kapha, we experience unconditional love.
This is what Pitta and Vata say about me when I’m in a good place. You see, I’m the storehouse for the energy they are so good at transforming and moving about!
Here’s an example of how they may lend me a helping hand….
When the gravitational pull towards disharmony starts creeping in, I call my Pitta friend to get ideas for ‘transforming my energy.’ Being masterful on this topic, he reminds me of several things I can do to jump-start my metabolism. From there, I selected one to experiment with for a month. Most recently, I decided to join him on his daily 6 AM jog.
My Vata friend, whose mastery lies in moving energy, also played a key role. She enthusiastically signed up to give me a high-pitched and rambling wake-up call around 4 AM. Oh… that dreadful call!! Yet, exactly what I need to transition from my favorite place, my cozy bed, to get my “bumbum” (but) out the door for a jog at such an early hour. Plus, unlike my friends, six hours of sleep is all I need to feel rested.
A win-win experience! While Pitta got to practice his impatience due to my slow start in that first mile, he’d also come to appreciate my natural stamina and endurance by the end of each run. Vata, too, was happy to have her typical oddly time awake serve a purpose.
Yet, it doesn’t end here. Let me tell you about the best part of all this….
Inspired by this new morning routine, I lightly stir some veggies with heating and digestive spices for lunch. This new choice replaces my usual mashed potatoes with lots of butter or some of my other preferred “creamy foods.” As my new eating habits optimize my digestion, unpleasantries, such as feeling nausea after eating and putting on excess weight, also dissipate.
More than helping me remember who I am, my friends help me connect to a tremendous power in me — the ability to make choices that bring me closer to my harmonious state. As I do, my challenging tendencies become more dormant, and habits that tip me off balance are no longer what I crave.
Now that I’ve shared a little window into my life as a Kapha, here’s a final thought from the writer of this article.
You, dear reader, may have related more to Kapha’s friends than her. Your predominant body/mind constitution may happen to be like mine (the writer) — Pitta and Vata. Still, you, like me, have already “built-in” the capacity to store, transform, and move energy.
Understanding and better managing these three energies in yourself is what equips you to mitigate the effects of your imbalances and support your well-being in the long haul.
The complete medical system, Ayurveda — ‘Living (Ayur) Knowledge’(Veda) — has withstood the test of time to vouch for this!
Has this story about Kapha given you a taste of how to have the more robust parts of you and the less obvious ones befriend one another?
In case you’ve caught glimpses of this here, mission accomplished.
This friendship is what it takes to integrate your tendencies and your choices.
May we all make more choices that support the whole of our being.
Are you curious to learn more about your unique body/mind constitution?
